Gifted Children - Getting the Balance Right

One of the challenges for parents with a gifted childwhen they start school as they focus their time and
is to encourage them to develop a range of interestenergy on making friends. In terms of fitting in to
outside the academic sphere that not only roundssocial settings this is essential however parents who
them out but stops them from being isolated fromare proud of their child's achievements can become
their peersquite anxious at this apparent shift in interest away
Gifted children are a diverse group of kids who arefrom learning. It is time like this that parents need to
talented in specific areas such as mathematics,step back and follow their child's lead and recognise
language, sport or music. Some gifted kids arethat different stages of development require children
mutli-talented excelling in a variety of areas.quite naturally to focus on different interests and
Gifted children tend to be passionate andevents.
single-minded about their interests focusing theirMaking friends
energy on the topics that absorb them, often to theOne of the most difficult tasks for a parent is to
exclusion of other activities.engineer circumstances so that children can make
Just as all children need to have a balanced diet tofriends. Some children make friends naturally while
remain in good health they need a balance betweenothers can be slow to warm up around their peers.
work and play to make sure they develop goodSome gifted kids can have difficulty making friends
social networks and maintain emotional health. Thatamong their own age group as their language or level
means that parents need to guide these childrenof interests don't match. In short, the world they
towards leisure-time options that they wouldn'tinhabit, their interests and the language they use can
normally consider.be so foreign to their peers that they have little in
Work from strengthscommon.
One way to encourage a gifted child to be morePeers have a strong influence on gifted children,
well-rounded is to get them to lead with theirencouraging them to try new activities and move
strengths. In other words, it maybe that a computeraway from their passions for a while. Parents need
whiz meets up with other like-minded souls butto take an active role in encouraging peer group
extend the meetings to activities away from theinteractions - organising joint play sessions with young
computer. Or an artistic child can be encouraged tochildren and providing extra-currucilar activities for
develop her literacy skills by adding simple stories toschool-aged children. Often children become less
their illustrations.involved in solitary activities when they begin to
Balance for gifted children doesn't necessarily meaninteract with their peers who exert a strong influence
that they spend an equal amount of time in everyon their activity preferences.
area but making sure that they don't becomeBeing part of the family
isolated as a result of their gift. Parents may need toFamily life can be a great leveller for gifted children. A
be part social director gently insisting that children setsibling can bring a talented child back to earth, letting
aside time for play and other social activities.them know that they may be a star at school or in
The courage to be imperfectsport but their talent pulls no rank at home. Jobs
Gifted children are often low risk-takers in areas orneed to be done, games can played and big heads
endeavours that are not their passions or strengths.can be easily deflated. Sometimes in families talented
Used to automatically excelling they fear doing thingschildren can be given special privileges or
poorly so exceptionally capable children can becompensation from doing chores. This is unhelpful as
reluctant to attempt unknown or different tasks.the normal processes of family-life helps gifted
Often exceptional kids give up when they are notchildren stay firmly grounded and not get carried
automatically good at something. It takes someaway with their own passions.
personal courage to step into the unknown andA well-rounded young person
actually attempt tasks where they don't automaticallyTalented kids can become self-absorbed in their
excel or feel that they can control.interests and passions to the detriment of developing
It helps to be direct with these children about theirbroader interests and in some cases social
perfectionism. Discuss with them that it is normal tointeractions. With a little coaching and prompting
be strong in some areas but not as capable in others.parents can help children achieve balance in their lives
Also these children need to understand that learningso that they don't become isolated and rely on a
in areas they feel uncomfortable can take muchnarrow set of interests for their identity and self
longer and require more effort than they are used to.esteem. The prime aim of parents, regardless of their
It can be quite a shock for talented kids to find thatchildren's talent is to help them become confident,
something doesn't come easily to them!well-rounded members of whatever groups they
Parents can push too hardbelong to.
Some gifted young children slow down their learning